Project Runway All-Stars: S2, E3

The Challenge: The designers met Carolyn in Long Island City, where they saw the world’s largest collection of “aerosol art.” Carolyn tasked the designers with making their own “wearable art,” which they were to create by using spray paint to design their own patterned fabric. While this seemed like a pretty creative idea for a challenge, it struck me as super difficult to spray paint something with any level of accuracy if you’ve never done so before – and, from some of the patterns the designers produced, I suspect I was right.

My Top Three:

  • Casanova: The shape of this dress was very basic (and verged on being cut too low in back), but I thought Casanova knocked it out of the park in terms of spray painting technique. His design actually did look like wearable art, which was the whole point of the challenge. I especially loved the little cityscape Casanova painted in the dress’s bottom left quadrant.
  • Anthony Ryan: I adored this dress, particularly the patten, which I found bold and graphic in the best way. The dress was also well-tailored, and I liked the wide black belt. Anthony Ryan’s look was the clear winner to me but, sadly, not to the judges.
  • Joshua: I struggled to come up with three top looks this week, so, suffice it to say, Joshua’s look is not my absolute favorite. However, I do think there’s some good stuff going on here. All his different patterns were quite interesting – to me, they seemed like they should not work together, but somehow the way he put this garment together, they did.

My Bottom Three:

  • Emilio: I hated this look – the print and color scheme were way too aggressive. I could tell Emilio’s pieces were well-made, but I simply could not get past the in-your-face coloring. It was just too much for me, so naturally the judges named Emilio the winner.
  • Suede: This garment looked very crafty and amateurish, as though there were a bunch of yellow circles slapped all over it for no good reason at all (which is quite possibly the case). I also hated the bottom of Suede’s dress – there was way too much fabric, and the construction of it looked so cheap.
  • Laura: It’s possible that I found Laura’s look even more atrocious than I otherwise would have because her personality has become so off-putting, but I really was not a fan of this piece. The mixture of purple and yellow paint became a little drab and gray looking, and the hemline (as Laura herself acknowledged) was way too short. But what bothered me the most about the dress was the back – those pieces of black fringe hanging off were just tacky.

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “I’m painting my canvas purple, yellow, and black, and I notice that Althea is using purple and yellow, because they look so great together. Oh, hey, Althea honey – you need to get your own ideas.” (Ugh, Laura Kathleen has turned into a full-on beast this season. Also, Laura – I’m pretty sure you’re not the first person in history to pair yellow and purple together).
  • “Now, I’m thinking of my fine line in fashion: is it hideous? Is it fabulous?” (Joanna to Kayne. Let’s all take a wild guess about which side of the line she thought Kayne’s garment fell on).
  • “But is he a seamstress or a designer?” (One of the guest judges on Kayne, which, if you’ve followed this show throughout the years, you probably know is one of the worst criticisms the judges can give).

Random Bits + Pieces:

  • The show insisted on using the term “aerosol art” repeatedly. I’m sorry, but can we just call it graffiti?
  • Kayne summed up the awfulness of Laura Kathleen perfectly when he said, “I’m hearing that Laura Kathleen has offended everyone. She’s on everyone’s last gay nerve.” I agree. I mean, when did Laura become such a seemingly terrible human being? I’m ready for her to go.
  • Andrae’s glasses this episode were very Harry Potter circa The Sorcerer’s Stone, were they not? Love it.
  • Speaking of Andrae – someone needs to forcibly remove the tulle from his hands. He uses it every week, and every week I come to the conclusion that it’s not adding anything to his look.
  • This week’s judges? Jeffrey Costello and Robert Tagliapietra, two designers who were dressed like lumberjacks and are apparently favorites of Anna Wintour’s. I had never heard of them before, but they delivered thoughtful and helpful critiques.

The Results: The judges named Emilio this week’s winner (Whaaaa? Anthony Ryan was robbed). Mercifully for PR fans across the universe, the judges eliminated Suede, thus sparing us of further weeks of listening to Suede talk about himself in the third person.

What did you think of this week’s Project Runway All-Stars? Do any of the designers have a future in “aerosol art”? Were you sad to see Suede go?

(All photos via Lifetime)

Project Runway All-Stars: S2, E2

Last week, I mentioned that I was a bit fatigued by Project Runway, but this week it occurred to me that this season is actually off to a promising start. The All-Stars episodes are one hour, instead of an hour and a half like Season 10, and I think the brisk pace suits the show – less workroom drama, more focus on the fashion. I’m also finding most of the cast appealing (and, when not appealing, at least interesting), and the fashions the designers turned out this week were solid overall. All in all, I’d say the second round of All-Stars is off to a much better start than the first edition.

The Challenge: Carolyn and some random executive for the Jones Group (who?) tasked the designers with creating a party look for a night on the town, inspired both by disco and a Nine West shoe (product placement alert!) of their choosing. Maybe it’s just me, but disco seems like one of the more random inspiration points for a challenge – of every era and style you could choose, you choose that? Plus, the word “disco” doesn’t exactly scream fashion-forward to me. But I guess that was the challenge?

My Top Three:

  • Joshua: This was a striking look, and I absolutely loved the vibrant turquoise fabric Joshua chose. I also thought the pantsuit was a nice choice – it evoked the ’70s but still looked wearable today. Joshua also include lots of nice details: the shiny lapels, the cute belt, and the cutout in the back. Joshua may be ridiculous, but I’m liking his work this season.
  • Laura Kathleen: She said her look was meant to evoke Diane von Furstenberg in the ’70s, and since I love DVF, I loved this look. The jacket was cute, but I loved the outfit even more without it since you could really see how striking (and fun!) the jumpsuit was.
  • Emilio: I just loved Emilio’s dress; he somehow made hot pink and hot yellow shiny fabric look sleek and chic. I thought this did a great job of fusing together the disco aesthetic with a ballgown – which is an odd combination, but I think Emilio pulled it off.

My Bottom Three:

  • Wendy: Oh, dear Lord. I don’t think I got the full effect of this outfit’s atrociousness from glimpses in the workroom, but I sure did when it walked down the runway. First, the bell-bottom pants? They were way too flared, and the material Wendy used for them was flat-out tacky. Second, this look was way overdone, particularly the metal chains hanging off the pants and the black gloves. The top was okay, but not good enough to save the outfit (or Wendy herself).
  • Suede: I hated Suede’s dress – it looked like a bulky, lumpy, wrinkled sheet. Wait, not just a wrinkled sheet, a wrinkled sparkly gold sheet. There was way too much fabric and way too little design in this garment. I cannot believe this wasn’t in the judges’ bottom three.
  • Andrae: My first thought was that it literally looked like Andrae’s model had a raw piece of purple tulle wrapped around her – what the hell? Also, once she took off her “coat,” there was nothing to the look; you were left with a simple pencil skirt and rather plain top.

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “Laura Kathleen is a sweet girl, but she can be a little annoying at times. I’m more interested in being in the mix with more of the real designers, like Emilio and Uli. Those are people I feel like are more designing on my level.” (I’m sorry, but was Althea this big of a bitch in her original season? I don’t remember her being this catty).
  • “If you want to make a costume for the ’70s, Wendy is killing this challenge.” (Laura Kathleen on Wendy. Guys, Laura Kathleen wants you to know that she’s mean, she has no friends in this competition, and she’s in it to win it).
  • “It’s like Mad Max. ‘Welcome to Thunderdome!’” (Joshua on Wendy Pepper’s look. Please note that the way he pronounced “Thunderdome” was fabulous).
  • “Just the word ‘blazer’ makes me shrivel up a little.” (Joanna to Laura Kathleen. Girl, what do you have against a good blazer?!)
  • “So, I’m feeling a bit of white man’s overbite when I look at this.” (Every week, there’s a moment that reaffirms my love for Joanna Coles, and this exchange with Suede was that moment. One, Joanna demonstrated the white man’s overbite dance. Two, she reminded me of Billy Crystal in my all-time favorite movie).
  • “I see these Mamma Mia inspired bell-bottom pants and I’m like…puuuke.” (Joshua on Wendy Pepper. He may be overly bitchy at times, but at least you can count on him for a good soundbite).
  • “And then there’s Suede’s. I’m not gonna dance in that dress. It’s like you’re stuck in a golden refrigerator.” (Uli on Suede. His dress was solid gold, but I’m a little lost on the refrigerator part of the analogy).
  • “That outfit belongs on the streets, in some back road at five in the morning.” (Uli on Wendy Pepper. Uli was a bit sassy – albeit in the sweetest way possible – this episode, no?)
  • “Talk to me about how this is referencing the ’70s…I mean, perhaps this was a couple of years in the ’70s where I was asleep.” (Joanna to Uli. Oh, Joanna. We know you weren’t sleeping during the ’70s, but rather raving at Studio 54).

Random Bits + Pieces:

  • “I immediately gravitated toward the orange heel. It just kind of spoke to me.” I don’t think I even need to tell you that it was Kayne who spoke these words.
  • “To create a look in a day, that’s no time at all. So if you see a glue gun coming out…honey, that’s okay.” Honey, it’s not okay. In saying this, Anthony Ryan summed up my basic problem with this show: they simply don’t give the designers enough time. C’mon, producers. Get with the program.
  • “You know what I like about this challenge? Nightlife. Slutty. Casanova.” I’m not sure why it’s a plus to associate yourself with “slutty” designs, Casanova, but whatever. Also, note that he put air quotes around all three words, a la Joey Tribiani.
  • Okay, Suede and Wendy Pepper? That’s like the weird friendship EVER. Maybe Wendy can use her new-found influence over Suede to make him stop talking in the third person. Forever.
  • Moment #2 that reaffirmed my love for Joanna Coles, from her exchange with Casanova: “Excellent. I like the word ‘comfort.’ It’s so important in fashion, but no one ever talks about it.” Preach, sister.
  • Kayne led the group in a disco dance party at the end of the workday (pictured above). Of course he did. Also note how joyfully Wendy Pepper joined in; she appears to have become totally zen since her season. I was curious to see how long that would last but, sadly, after her elimination, I guess we will never know.
  • This week’s guest judge? Rafe Totengco, who designs handbags for Nine West. I knew he was an appropriate choice for this challenge, but my gut reaction was that I wanted to see a more “name” designer in the guest chair. However, Totengo offered very thoughtful critiques and won me over – he was a solid guest judge overall.

The Results: The judges named Uli the winner. Her look was not my favorite, but I like Uli so much that I couldn’t help but be pleased with her win. Wendy Pepper was sent home, which surprised me – I thought the producers would keep her around for the potential drama factor alone.

What did you think of last night’s PR All-Stars? Will you miss Wendy? Will Andrae ever put down the tulle and make a good design? And will Suede ever stop referring to himself in the third person, for the love of all that is good and holy?

(All photos via Lifetime)

Project Runway: Season 10, Episode 13

By now, the rhythm of Project Runway has become familiar; this many seasons into the show, it wasn’t hard to predict how this episode would play out. The designers would leave, Tim would come visit them at home, the designers would return (so happy to see each other again! Besties!), and the designers would have mini-meltdowns as they tried to select which of their looks they would present to the judges to make it to Fashion Week. There were no trips to Mood, no montages of the designers sketching, and no wacky challenges – and while this made the hour relatively low-key, it also meant the focus was on the fashion. Which, given that this is a fashion competition, is probably just as it should be. So let’s get right to it: who’s going to Fashion Week?

The Challenge: Heidi and Tim informed the designers that they would each get $9000 to create their collections…but that not all four were guaranteed a spot in the finals. This was meant to be shocking, but since this happens pretty much every season, it barely registered. The designers headed home to create their looks and then, upon their return to New York, were told they would have to show three pieces to secure their places at Fashion Week.

Here are my thoughts on each designer’s look, from my most favorite to least.

Dmitry’s Three Looks:

  • Look One: I did not love how shapeless this dress was, but I adored the geometry of the piece – very cool.
  • Look Two: Not sure about this. I loved the pants – they were impeccably tailored and just all-around quite cool. Dmitry started to lose me on the top, though. Something about the sheerness of this just didn’t read “chic” to me, which is the word I typically associate with Dmitry’s style.
  • Look Three: Yikes! Not sure about the fringed arms on the jacket, and again, the sheer top underneath. But, the jacket (and the material it was made of) were fantastic.
  • Overall: I wanted to love this because I love Dmitry, but I just didn’t. These pieces were solid but not wonderful. You could see the architectural look that Dmitry was going for, and everything was impeccably made as per usual, but some of his choices just felt off. But, I thought everyone’s looks were lackluster last night – so I would still rate Dmitry’s mini-collection at the top.

Fabio’s Three Looks:

  • Look One: Loved the pants, loved the necklace. The top looked cheap to me (though I liked the fabric it was made of) and the vest wasn’t anything special.
  • Look Two: I hated the way this top puckered; it was an interesting idea with the geometric cutouts, but Fabio did not execute it well. The back of the top, with it’s lace panel, was quite pretty.
  • Look Three: Hated this. It just looked like a bedsheet, to be honest. I did love the geometric neckline though.
  • Overall: These pieces did look like a cohesive collection, and I loved the geometric flourishes Fabio added throughout. But, I wasn’t crazy about his color palette – it looked too washed out. And, as the judges noted, some of these pieces looked cheap. I still rate this above Melissa and Christopher though; at least Fabio tried to do something different and special, whereas what we saw from the other two were drab, blah messes.

Melissa’s Three Looks:

  • Look One: GAH! This look is a gothic nightmare. The shorts aren’t anything special (why did everyone think sending shorts down the runway was a great way to get a ticket to Fashion Week?!), and I hated the cut of the top. Also, the model’s wig is atrocious.
  • Look Two: I hated the asymmetry of the coat. I’m pretty sure it was a deliberate design choice, but to me, it just came off looking haphazardly made. I also wasn’t wild about the over-sized cuffs.
  • Look Three: I liked this dress – simple and chic, though not exactly groundbreaking. But, as per usual, Melissa just had to add an exaggerated collar. The judges love to complain when somebody is one note – so why haven’t they criticized Melissa more over her collar obsession?
  • Overall: This collection was very Melissa – of the four designers, her looks were the most predictable, based on what we saw from her throughout the course of the season. But, it contained a little too much black and a few too many exaggerated collars for my taste.

Christopher’s Three Looks:

  • Look One: This was WAY too simple. I mean, what was special or fashion-forward about this look? Simple shirt, simple shorts, simple vest. I just didn’t get why Christopher chose to send this down the runway.
  • Look Two: Again, what was special about this? The leather shorts were fine, but 99.9% of women couldn’t wear them. The ostrich belt, allegedly the cool detail here, was so tiny that I didn’t even notice it.
  • Look Three: And, again, SO simple. What the hell? This is a skirt and a bandeau top – no more, no less. Also, I hated the way Christopher placed his silly x-ray print on the back of the dress. It almost looked like his model had a tail!
  • Overall: I’m not sure why Christopher chose these three looks – they didn’t make much impact, and they were all too simple. They didn’t show off any of his skills! I would have liked to see Christopher show a gown to the judges, or at least something with more impact and workmanship.

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “I really don’t feel like she pushed the envelope…her white collared jacket, I feel like I’ve seen it before. What’s so special about this?” (Christopher on Melissa’s collection. Dude may have had a point there).
  • “I’m definitely underwhelmed by Christopher’s collection. He has some very classic pieces and then he has some slutty pieces. It just doesn’t flow.” (Dmitry on Christopher’s collection)
  • “That little sweater and those shorts…if you have the opportunity to go to Fashion Week, you cannot send that down to the runway…It’s so boring. I don’t even understand why you would show this to us today.” (Heidi on one of Christopher’s pieces. I couldn’t agree more, Frau Klum).
  • “I would also rethink the sleeves on that jacket; they look a little Robin Hood to me…just cut them off” (Nina on Melissa’s jacket. It did have ridiculous sleeves).

Random Bits + Pieces:

  • Tim was killing it, wardrobe-wise, during his visits to each designer. His tie during his visit to Christopher was fabulous, especially when paired with his checkered shirt. And then his pocket squares when he visited Fabio were equally fabulous. So dapper, that Tim.
  • In an attempt to be innovative, Christopher played around with bleach on leather. Tim went nuts for the technique, but to me, it looked like…Christopher had accidentally spilled bleach on leather. I just didn’t get why this was so special.
  • I love when Tim mingles with the ordinary folks (aka, the designers’ families). Upon seeing the food Christopher’s family had provided: “This looks so…caloric!”
  • Melissa was super confident about her look when Tim came to visit her in San Francisco, but when she arrived back in New York and headed to the workroom, her confidence evaporated almost instantaneously. I’m not sure what it is with Melissa, but she really seems to choke under pressure. Fabio said it best: “She loves what she’s doing, but she’s not as confident as she should be.”
  • The designers only had five weeks to put together their collections?!? Anybody else remember the halcyon days of Project Runway when the designers had months to create their final collections? No wonder they were almost universally crappy. Producers, let’s adjust this, stat.
  • This week’s guest judge? There wasn’t one. I have to say, the show was just fine without an extra chair; it allowed us to focus on the judges whose opinions I actually respect: Nina, Michael, and, heck, even Heidi. When deciding between a vapid young actress and thin air for the guest judge, thin air appears to come out on top.

The Results: You’re going to Fashion Week! And you’re going to Fashion Week! And you’re going to Fashion Week! Sorry, I didn’t mean to go all Oprah there, but everybody got to move on, making this episode completely meaningless filler. I suppose I am glad that all four are still in it, since I like them all, but this episode was just a waste of time, and I’m a little bitter about that.

(Judges, contestants, and runway photos via Lifetime; Michael Kors’s face of brilliance via Entertainment Weekly)

Project Runway: Season 10, Episode 4

Last night’s episode of Project Runway was one of the stranger I can recall seeing in all ten seasons of this wacky design and sewing safari we know and love. After the dust settled, my major question was: have these people never seen PR before? Did they not expect that it would be an emotionally draining experience? The answer to both questions appeared to be “no,” as nearly every contestant seemed to be mid-nervous breakdown or teetering on the verge of one.

In summary: everything unraveled. Andrea disappeared in the middle of the night, then sent an email saying she was quitting. Kooan declared he was leaving for vague and incomprehensible reasons. Fabio started weeping and said he wanted to leave but wouldn’t. The producers brought Raul back because, in Tim’s words, the competition must be kept fair (or because, in my words, they needed to make sure they had enough contestants to film their pre-planned number of episodes). In any case, the workroom was crazy this week, and with so much drama off the runway, the clothing shown on the runway seemed lackluster in comparison. Let’s discuss.

The Challenge: The designers headed to Michael Kors’s flagship store where Tim tasked them with designing an outfit for a “woman on the go” that was consistent with their own aesthetic. Everyone kept stressing that the look had to be “in their own aesthetic,” which I found odd. Aren’t the designers supposed to create everything in their own aesthetic? It’s not like Tim has ever opened a challenge by saying, “designers, please create something highly derivative of McQueen.”

Anyway, armed with these maddeningly vague challenge parameters, the designers set off to Parsons to gather supplies. While none of the finished products were trainwrecks, I found most of this week’s designs underwhelming.

My Top Three:

  • Gunnar: I hate to give props to anything created by Satan’s bitchiest minion, but I liked this dress and thought it deserved better than middle of the pack. The color palette was unique and the skirt was interesting.
  • Sonjia: The grey was a little muted, but I loved this garment and agreed with the judges giving Sonjia the win. To my eye, the dress fit perfectly and the way Sonjia worked the fabric was gorgeous. Perhaps it wasn’t a revolutionary dress, but all the effort and detail here were fabulous, particularly the little ruffle in front. Nina called the look “conservative yet sexy,” and I concur.
  • Ven: Ven has a look, and sometime soon (mark my words), the judges will begin to criticize him for always sticking to that look. But, my thought is: why change something when it works so well? This was a cool dress, with a nice silhouette and pretty pleating on top. I also liked the zipper work – it added an edgy and unexpected element to the design.

My Bottom Three:

  • Raul: This was just weird – a pair of oddly-fitted pants with a jacket that resembled a pointy apron pinned to the front. The more I look at them, the more the fit of the pants bothers me. If Raul wanted to prove his skills as a menswear designer, making this garment was not the way to do it.
  • Elena: Like Ven, Elena has a very specific, very distinctive aesthetic. Sadly, that aesthetic appears to be “gothic space alien.” The coat here was just plain bizarre – who would wear something that bulky? Completely impractical, and even if she was going for avant-garde, there’s nothing special about this design.
  • Melissa: I want Melissa to be one of my favorite designers, but for that to happen, she’s going to need to experiment with a shade other than black. I saw this look and thought, UGH. Just stop with the sad black, Melissa. Beyond that, this garment was shapeless; the model looked like a hobo who was wearing every item of clothing she owned on her back.

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “Can I be blunt? It looks sad.” (Tim to Nathan, delivered in the patented Tim Gunn tone of mournful incredulity).
  • “I think Raul has no point of view, to be honest, because everything he does is just a mess. He needs to go home again.” (Ven, clearly in the running for this season’s Miss Congeniality prize).
  • “It looks like a hairdressing smock. She was cutting her hair, there was a fire in the beauty salon, she belted it, and she ran out in her zebra dress.” (Michael on Buffi. I live for Michael creating fanciful little stories like this).

Random Bits + Pieces:

  • Tonight’s guest judges: Hayden Panettiere and Rachel Roy. I’ll let you guess which is which, but one of these ladies is a legitimate fashion authority and one is not. On second thought, I’ll just tell you: I was impressed by Roy’s thoughtful critiques and underwhelmed by Panettiere’s (failed) attempts to say anything of substance.
  • “Way to be immature, Andrea” says Gunnar, himself the very picture of maturity.
  • Buffi began growing on me, personality-wise, so naturally she was the designer sent home. I’ll miss her ridiculous (faux?) accent, her bubbly disposition, and her colorful albeit highly questionable personal style.
  • Sonjia, with her gigantic hair bow, seemed to be channeling the ridiculous fasteners favored by Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie. But, you know what? I kind of dig it – Sonjia, unlike Buffi, has great personal style, which bodes well for her design sensibility.
  • I was baffled by Christopher’s unsolicited advice to Buffi. Thanks for the “constructive criticism” buddy, but it’s kind of condescending to question Buffi’s choices and say she should use your fabric instead.

The Result: The judges sent Buffi home in an auf-ing foreshadowed throughout the episode. I would have preferred seeing Raul sent home again, if only because I find Buffi more entertaining (clearly a legitimate basis on which to judge a design competition).

If you watched last night’s Project Runway, what did you think? Will Melissa, Dmitry, and Elena ever discover the rainbow of colors that exists beyond basic black? Will any of the other designers crack under the pressure? And who will get sent packing next week?

(Runway and judges photos via Lifetime; Michael Kors’s face of brilliance via Entertainment Weekly)

Project Runway All-Stars: Episode 12 (Finale)

After 11 weeks of outlandish outfits from pseudo-All Stars, countless monotone introductions from robo-Angela, spot-on critiques from Georgina, general unbearableness from Isaac, and workroom gems from Joanna, we finally came to the end of the proverbial runway with last night’s Project Runway All-Stars finale. I enjoyed this season in the beginning, but in recent weeks, my enthusiasm has dwindled considerably. I had a hard time rooting for any of these folks (I kept thinking about who I would have cast instead), and the absence of Nina/Michael/Tim/Frau Klum grew increasingly glaring as the weeks dragged on. And, as I said back in Episode 1, this season seemed tailor-made (heh! fashion puns!) for Mondo to win, so it was a predictable and anticlimactic finale. Now that it’s all over, I can wholeheartedly say: Bring on Season 10.

But before we get to that, here’s what I thought of last night’s three collections.

Austin

I agreed with Tommy Hilfiger, who pointed out that half of Austin’s collection was quite rock and roll (with the leather, bright fabrics, etc.), while the other half was composed of frilly, puffy gowns. It was a jarring combination and – while I’m certain Mondo was always preordained to win this thing – I’d guess it hurt any chance Austin had of taking home the top prize.

(All photos via Lifetime)

  • Look 1: The crazy pants and black glitter jacket were a little too avant-garde for me (and dare I say a little too Jetsons-inspired?). Both the pink fabric and the jacket looked oddly wrinkled and sloppy. And what girl wants to look like she has HUGE hips??
  • Look 2: I liked the black dress with the lace top, minus the one weird hip protrusion. This was a dress I could picture real people wearing, though it was a shade boring.
  • Look 3: Overall, I liked the combination of the pink v-neck blouse with the black leather skirt. In a way, this was my favorite piece of Austin’s, primarily because it was something I could envision wearing in my everyday life, perhaps to work (of course, that means it was not exactly high fashion). The little pads/ruffles on the shoulders were a fun touch, but the top looked wrinkly, like he was rushing to finish this piece.

  • Look 4: I found the fabric on Austin’s big statement dress quite off-putting and tacky. Also, the dress was just a HUGE blob of material. It looked cumbersome and heavy to me; I usually expect Austin to be whimsical and light with his gowns.
  • Look 5: I’ll admit that I kind of liked the black leather jumpsuit, though it was probably too Catwoman-esque. Also, this piece didn’t seem to fit tonally with the rest of Austin’s collection. It stuck out, but not in a good way.
  • Look 6: I was not a fan of Austin’s BIG white wedding dress. On the top, it was very Madonna, circa Like a Virgin, with the black gloves and white ruffles. I agreed with Tommy Hilfiger again – this didn’t belong in the collection. And, for once, I disagreed with Georgina – I could NOT see a million women wanting to get married in this.

Mondo

I liked this collection a lot, and I too would have given Mondo the win (despite his outlandish, annoying behavior last week). What I loved about this was that Mondo stayed true to himself. All the quirky details he included were just so him (and so delightful).

  • Look 1: Mondo’s first look out the gate was strong, and I particularly loved the blouse – so fun! I was less a fan of the skirt. Does it look like it’s made of duct tape to anyone else?
  • Look 2: I adored this simple polka dot dress. What got me here were the exaggerated, whimsical details – the big pockets, the collar, and the gigantic buttons. They made the piece quirky and interesting.
  • Look 3: The silver tunic top and weird black leggings were Mondo’s big misstep. The top was just hanging there; it wasn’t anything special. And black leggings with weird pieces cut out of them? Gross.

  • Look 4: This was another favorite of mine. At first, I was ambivalent about the little peek of red, but ultimately I decided I appreciated it as yet another quirky Mondo-detail. The pants were tailored insanely well. So beautiful. This piece looked intricate and complicated, and I like that.
  • Look 5: I thought the peek of red worked even better with this dress. The print was also quite interesting here. Did one of the judges say Mondo created this print himself? If so, wow. That makes this even more impressive.
  • Look 6: I liked the long, flowy dress Mondo ended with, but it didn’t mesh that well with his other looks. The fabric was slightly crazy (and maybe borderline disco), but I loved how beautifully the dress flowed. I also loved the little peek of white lining. Very cool.

Michael

I enjoyed Michael’s collection, mostly because I personally think the flowy, funky, resort-wear stuff is fun (that’s why I always loved Season 3′s Uli. Remember her?). That said, there wasn’t anything particularly innovative about this. It was supremely wearable (particularly if you are weekend-ing in Miami Beach or something. Not that I’ve ever done that), but it didn’t seem like a show-stopping, finale-worthy collection.

  • Look 1: I loved the tan/gold jumpsuit Michael opened his show with – fun, perfect beach wear. The accessorizing bothered me though; he overdid it with the necklaces and they detracted from the overall appeal of the garment.
  • Look 2: Michael’s zebra print dress just looked like a normal dress to me – not particularly interesting. Also, this was maybe a little too tight/trashy.
  • Look 3: The shape and fabric choice here were cool, though I didn’t care for the slight puff at the hips. Why do these designers always do stuff like that? It’s not flattering! In any case, this dress was too simple. It was nice, but I wasn’t blown away.

  • Look 4: I loved Michael’s short jumpsuit – it was perhaps my favorite look of his. The fabric choice was excellent, it moved well, and it screamed summertime to me.
  • Look 5: I liked Michael’s long zebra-print jumpsuit, but the odd thing was, for being zebra-print, it wasn’t that interesting. You would think such a loud pattern would make for a more powerful look, but something about this fell flat for me.
  • Look 6: I enjoyed Michael’s signature Grecian draping, though it’s not exactly stretching himself. I also found it odd that this was the one non-printed look. And I HATED the black vest he put over the dress. When the model was actually wearing the vest, this look did not work for me.

Random Bits + Pieces:

  • Does Angela’s over-pronunciation of “embroidery” bother anyone else? It’s in the intro they play every single week and it drives me insane. Also, when she was introducing the designers’ runway collections, she sounded like she was putting on a Madonna-faux-British accent. I mean, who knew I could miss Heidi Klum so much?
  • I loved Joanna lint-brushing Mondo. He, however, didn’t love it so much: “It’s a little uncomfortable. It’s like your aunt rolling you down.” Come on, Mondo. That was precious.
  • Nina Garcia was in the house! Man, I miss her. And then they showed a Tim Gunn season 10 promo! I don’t know if it was smart for the producers to repeatedly remind us how much we were missing these guys.
  • When Michael said “I promised myself I wouldn’t cry” after the runway show, it seemed so fake to me, almost like he was willing himself to squeeze out a tear. Odd.
  • On the runway for their final critiques, was Austin wearing a hot pink mesh scarf? If so…fabulous. He’s just the best.

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “Does Liza Minelli know you went through her wardrobe?” (Mondo, on Austin’s outfit. Priceless.)

And in case you missed ‘em: Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3, Episode 4, Episode 5, Episode 6, Episode 7, Episode 8, Episode 9, Episode 10, and Episode 11.

Project Runway All-Stars: Episode 11

(Image via MyLifetime.com)

On last night’s Project Runway, the final three designers learned that their last challenge would be to put five looks together in four days. I was extremely confused by this – at this point in the competition, the designers are typically sent home, getting several months to work on their collections before showing at New York Fashion Week. But with this turn of events, it doesn’t look like the designers will get to show at Fashion Week – nor will they have the time and the budget to create truly “wow” looks. I suppose a lackluster final challenge is roughly on par with this lackluster season, but I was seriously bummed by this turn of events.

Also in typical Project Runway fashion, there was a “surprise” last-minute addition to the challenge, which of course was not a “surprise” at all because the producers insist upon doing it every season. Robo-Joanna informed the designers they would have to create a sixth look out of old scraps from past challenges. The use of old materials seemed like a crazy requirement – the judges always complain when final collections aren’t “cohesive,” so why force the designers to work with fabrics that potentially don’t fit with the collections they had already conceptualized and begun developing? Yet another head-scratching element of Project Runway All-Stars.

Since the final runway show won’t be until next week, I can offer no fashion commentary and critique here (which is a shame, really, because that’s pretty much the reason I started recapping the show). In any case, here are a few more scattered observations:

  • Austin’s mustache is gone! Hurray! All is right with the world again.
  • When the designers went to the Marie Claire office for their consultations/pep talk session, Joanna’s yellow dress was fabulous.
  • Is it just me, or does Mondo complain every single week that he’s “not feeling it” and “not inspired”? It almost seems like part of his process at this point – complain about how horribly he’s doing, and then ultimately create the winning look. This week, however, he took it to new extremes – he wasted his entire first day “lounging around the workroom” (in his own words). He came off like a huge jerk this episode, and I’m finding myself rooting against him.
  • How much do the models really matter? The designers always make a big deal out of selecting them, and this episode’s model casting was no exception (leading to a mini-catfight between Austin and Mondo). In a sense I understand it, but I also know that in all my years of watching Project Runway, I can’t remember ever noticing a model. It’s a fashion competition, and I’m always focused on the clothes.
  • I loved having Anthony back, as Austin’s temporary “helper” this episode. He’s solid as a designer, but more importantly, he’s a comedic-quote-generating-machine. What a gem.
  • Michael described his collection’s aesthetic as an “African safari.” Does anyone remember (the far-superior) Michael Knight from Season 3? He also described his final collection in similar terms and the judges hated it. I’m just sayin’…

Bitchy Lines of the Night:

  • “He went from Errol Flynn to Kermit the Frog” (Mondo on Austin, post-mustache shaving)
  • “I love Austin and I hope he does well. But I think Austin’s collection most definitely requires the hands of Anthony L. Williams.” (Anthony on Austin. Welcome back, Anthony. I missed your utter fabulosity. Also, this line was not particularly bitchy; mostly I just wanted to quote Anthony.)

What did you think of the final challenge? Are you rooting for any of the designers, or are you simply ready for “All-Stars” to be over?

Reverse Bucket List

(image via MotiFake)

I am a big list-maker. I have lists – tasks I need to complete, books I want to read, places I plan to travel – scattered around my computer, iPhone, notebooks, and various random scraps of paper. It’s actually somewhat daunting to think of all the things I’ve scribbled down over the years. But what about those things I never want to do? Surely there are plenty that qualify, yet I’ve never written those down. However, I saw this “Reverse Bucket List” on the Hairpin and it inspired me to create my very own anti-Bucket List. Here’s what I never, ever want to do.

  1. Go Black Friday shopping. I hate shopping on a random Tuesday afternoon in March, so you can imagine how much the idea of Black Friday shopping horrifies me. I just do not get the appeal; no bargain is worth it.
  2. Eat haggis. I’m not good with icky foods, so I could easily substitute a dozen other things for “haggis.” But you get the idea.
  3. Go to a Nickelback concert. I really don’t think I need to explain this one.
  4. Watch the Human Centipede. I cannot even discuss this movie without feeling physically ill. Ask my old coworkers – they have seen my reaction (and mocked it).
  5. Get Botox or plastic surgery. I understand why women do it, and I wish society didn’t make women feel compelled to do so. But, have you ever looked at someone and said, “wow, your wrinkle-free, yet completely emotionless face looks great!” I think not.
  6. Read books 2-4 of the Twilight series. I read book one, and it was enough to convince me that never has a worse book series been written.
  7. Marry an Ohio State fan/alum. It would be unnatural. Go Blue!
  8. Watch golf. On television, in person, or any other way you can imagine. I can tolerate a lot of boring sports (see: baseball), but I cannot tolerate this one.
  9. Be on a reality show (with the exception of the Amazing Race). Yes, I watch reality television, but 95% of the people on it make me feel sad about the future of humanity.
  10. Own a cat. I’m allergic, and also…I hate cats.